You’re Ugly and Your Drama Dresses You Funny.

Of course, I am talking about PARA drama.

For the uninitiated, para drama is a stupid term invented to define an even stupider thing.  That stupid thing being the ridiculously disproportionate amount of infighting, backstabbing, trickery, chicanery, and downright lying that members of a so-called “paranormal community” commit towards each other with more regularity than a prunes-and-Metamucil diet.  Para drama is, in fact, the new argyle.

I have been vascillating back and forth between calling people out and naming names and saying “you all know who you are and you suck and I hate you!!!”  I’m honestly not even sure if I am vascillating right.  There are so many arms on this octopus, with each tentacle possessing so many hundreds of individual kinds of suck, that it would be nearly impossible to examine each one individually while trying to keep the rest of the “suck” from attaching itself to you in the process.  People seriously HATE each other, and with no good reason.  It’s UNbelievable.

I submit to you the most recent example of treachery – the Shannon Sylvia/Donna LaCroix debaucle.  In a nutshell:  Shannon Sylvia publicly accused her “friend” - Donna LaCroix - of lying about having terminal cancer to avoid having a particular interview aired.  Now ask me what ANY of that has to do with the topic of paranormal investigation?  I have no idea.  It’s just one example out of a million of exactly how people willfully F*CK each other in this “business.”

Now, just to make sure I am not suddenly accused of “wanting to be famous,” (a statement that – in the “paranormal community” - roughly equates to “I molest children”) I want to make my own personal agenda perfectly clear.  I am a writer who likes ghosts.  I have written three books on the topic of the paranormal, and am contracted to write at least two more.  My goal is to sell books.  Now, to clarify even further, the books I have written (along with Patrick) are based on a specific protocol that we have modified from old-school paranormal investigation technique.  Sensory replication.  No big vans full of computers and TV cameras and producers and corporate sponsorships.  We spend time in allegedly haunted places to see if anything happens to us, and then we write about it.  Full stop.  There is nothing fake about what we do.  We only have ourselves to answer to, and we are fully accountable for our actions and stand behind every single word we write, as I do for this post.

The reason for the clarification comes from the idea that we are all “looking for the same thing.”  WE are not.  Paranormal investigators appear to be programmed to say that we are all “looking for answers.”  Not all of us are.  I am willing to admit that I don’t even know what the f*cking QUESTIONS are that we should be asking.  I am not out to prove or disprove, nor am I seeking approval.  I am also not claiming to be a scientist, and I am also not claiming to be psychic, clairvoyant, or a medium.  I AM, however, looking to sell books.  Sue me.

I cannot log on to Facebook these days without seeing people flinging their own personal shit at each other, accusing each other of any manner of subterfuge, all the while touting their own shiny, untarnished halos.  In my opinion, the people making the biggest accusations are the ones who have nothing to offer, are currently realizing they have nothing to offer, and are panicking because the end of the gravy train is in sight.  The ship is going down and it’s every man for themselves.

Frankly, I’m embarrassed for the people doing the accusing.  It is unneccessary and irrelevant, and such accusations only make the motivations of the accuser suspect.  For example, “If people think this show is faked, I won’t get to be on TV anymore, so I better draw negative attention to the squealer.”  We aren’t really fooled by it, and no amount of martyrly Facebookery is going to erase the fact that you have opened a can of worms and they are now crawling all over you.  You know who you are.  Interesting sidenote:  I also feel that discussing the amount of hair that might be growing on another investigator’s nipples, and asking callers to a radio show if they would “fuck” said investigator is also irrelevant, inappropriate, and just mean – regardless of circumstance.

The problem here is that everyone clammoring to be heard within this “community” has imagined that there is a huge “brass ring” to be grabbed, bringing with it an endless flow of fame, fortune, beauty, and popularity.  Once everyone realizes that this is just one more mirror and a lot more smoke, perhaps the fuss will die down and those with a genuine interest will remain standing, and those that simply want to keep others from enjoying themselves will erode away like rotting flesh.  I have made no secret of my belief that “ghost shows” from top to bottom are as fake as Heidi and Spencer, and those seeking to suckle that teet can feel free to do so, but please know that the rest of us do not prefer to have that stink on us.  If your goal is to be on TV and have a franchise, say so, believe it, and achieve it.  But please, once again, do NOT piss on the rest of our legs and tell us it’s raining.

To the fakers and troublemakers – you are dismissed.  Please go lay down by your dishes.

To those who RAWK, I salute you.  Specifically that Mike Roberts.  He’s one to watch, you know.  That boy is GOING PLACES, and he is pretty EASY ON THE EYES *fans self*…whew…Damn, I want him to be famous.  You should, too.

Peace out.

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About Katie Mullaly

Katie Mullaly is the author (along with Patrick) of the very popular Scare-Izona: A Travel Guide to Arizona's Spookiest Spots and Tucson's Most Haunted. Their third book - Finding Ghosts in Phoenix - will hit the shelves this fall, and two more books are currently in production. As well as writing for the hugely popular "The Buzz Media" website, she can frequently be seen as a featured extra in most of Peter Leon's films. She is her own Easter egg. Basically, she's awesome. She would also like to meet Adam Lambert because he's cool on a cellular level. So, if anyone can hook that up for her, that'd be great.

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53 Responses to “You’re Ugly and Your Drama Dresses You Funny.”

  1. Mike Roberts May 22, 2010 at 11:23 pm #

    You know you are going to get a bunch of hate mail and drama for that last part! haha That is tooooooo funny!

  2. Katie May 23, 2010 at 12:16 am #

    Really? Listen to the wet spelunk of my “giving a shit.”

  3. Anna Marie May 23, 2010 at 5:08 am #

    Ha! I think you’ve written a more than fair assessment of what’s been going on. And yet, you’ve only scratched the surface. ;oD

  4. Tiffany Johnson May 23, 2010 at 7:06 am #

    Kudos, Katie. BRAVO. I kinda want to give you a smootch. ;)

  5. Jenny Stewart May 23, 2010 at 7:22 am #

    You ROCK!!! a million Kudos to you!!!

  6. Biker Dave May 23, 2010 at 7:31 am #

    My nipples are hard…. and hairy. Well done young lady, well done. I was hoping to hear about those who mustn’t be named…. the cage of monkeys who love to sling poo at EVERYONE… because they are so much smarter than the rest of us… but hey, good start.

  7. Riyad Kalla May 23, 2010 at 8:12 am #

    I just feel bad for anyone in your field trying to get real work done… hope some good comes from pulling the covers back and shining the light on some of these folks. If enough like-minded folks get together (retardation == bad) I wonder if you could create a “Code of Ethics” and define a method/type of investigation that follows that code?

    Who knows… r-tards always find a way to jam themselves in to anything interesting, so it might be a moot point.

  8. Truth Seeker May 23, 2010 at 8:22 am #

    Great read and behind it 100%.

  9. Diana Walker May 23, 2010 at 8:23 am #

    Well done Katie! I am also tired of all the para drama. I am in the back, way back of the paranormal world, but have seen too many of my good friends hurt in all of the lies. I just want to ghost hunt and have fun. If I help someone in the process, all the better :o)

  10. Gennifer May 23, 2010 at 9:47 am #

    Didnt some of the people leaving comments here just sling shit at people on a radio show recently ? hypocrites lol

  11. Mike Roberts May 23, 2010 at 10:04 am #

    @Gennifer….do you think it’s possible that the slinging was done in RETALIATION to something already done to them?

  12. Katie Mullaly May 23, 2010 at 10:22 am #

    First, thanks for reading and commenting! Second, regarding the retaliatory “shit-slinging”: This has been going on since the very first person pulled a sheet over their head and said, “boo.” The example stated is only the most recent and most well-known.

    I can’t accurately respond because I don’t know which radio show you are referring to, nor do I know which people. I certainly wasn’t one of those people, and I am no hypocrite.

    • Riyad Kalla May 23, 2010 at 11:09 am #

      Katie, maybe pitch the idea of a new radio show to paraX called “Paratardation” and interview the shit-slingers… just an idea :)

  13. t_alenduff May 23, 2010 at 10:49 am #

    KUDO’S!! I am also tired of the crap that has been going on, especially with groups here in GA. They need to loose their ‘diva’ attitudes and do what they are all about – helping people!!! I couldn’t give a rat’s behind if my face ever makes it front of a camera. IF I cared about that, I would have chosen a different career path back in my twenties!

  14. Katie May 23, 2010 at 12:15 pm #

    Riyad, you are f*cking BRILLIANT. I think Paratardation is the NEW para drama!!

    @t_alenduff, thanks! I’m not saying it’s not okay to WANT to be on TV, just say what you do and do what you say, it’s that simple. I’d be on TV if someone asked me to, I just wouldn’t do anything that would compromise my integrity.

    As far as divas go, it’s just like the movie Mean Girls. Feed them Kalteen bars, they’ll get fat and go away. They tend to quiet down when you call them out on their bullshit. I know from experience.

  15. t_alenduff May 23, 2010 at 4:50 pm #

    Yes, I agree it’s not wrong to want to be on TV, but the majority that I know say they don’t while they backstab every group around to get ahead. What’s so sad, they don’t see the harm they are causing themselves and the group they are in. I’m not going to kiss up to somebody who does appear TV weekly or in specials so that I’ll get my chance. It is either going to happen or not.

    Not to brag, but the group I’m in was chosen over several other very well known groups here in GA, to do a certain event in October. Why? Because we are down to earth, and aren’t out there doing just what these other groups are doing – backstabbing and full of themselves. I didn’t not attend, but our group was also asked to do a well known show up in Boston that appears on TLC, and have been asked back. One of the other groups had the chance, but after the people talked to them, they declined them and asked our group. This of course has the others talking about us. Oh well, maybe one of these days they’ll realize……..

    And no, I’m not saying I would decline, but that is not what I am in this field for. First and foremost it is to help people come to terms with what is going on. Whether it be actual activity or something that can easily be explained.

    And I love Riyad’s idea also!!

  16. Vera Ellen May 23, 2010 at 6:47 pm #

    You DO rock, Katie! Keep up the good work!

    How about the ‘psychics’ or ‘mediums’ who repeat themselves so obviously, it’s pathetic…. Just give clients what you receive or apologize and tell the truth when you have nothing. It is demeaning to the whole ‘group’ to lie, embelish, or say half- truths.

    The whole world is opening exponentially to the paranormal. Negativity just slows that process and creates nay-sayers.

    Namaste, all!

  17. Katie May 23, 2010 at 6:53 pm #

    Hey, if you have an accomplishment that you are proud of and want to mention, that’s not bragging. If you want to leverage one success into another, that’s totally cool.

    I think making goals clear at the outset would get rid of a LOT of this infighting. For instance, we don’t – as a general rule – investigate private residences. It doesn’t meet our criteria for phenomena that we are looking to publish at this time. I personally feel strongly about historic preservation, and I want to feature people living in historic buildings happily alongside their ghosts, and I want others to have that opportunity.

    So, that right there is a different angle that we bring to the table.

    Once we realize we aren’t all after the same “buried treasure,” then the pressure’s off…but I believe that those that make all the noise do so because that is what they thrive on.

  18. t_alenduff May 23, 2010 at 7:35 pm #

    Right on Katie! Right on!!

  19. L.T.Cochran May 23, 2010 at 7:38 pm #

    All I can say is Amen !
    It has become an embarrasment and disgrace to be labeld a paranormal investigator and I just wrote a blog on my facebook account about this very same topic !!

  20. Katie May 23, 2010 at 8:04 pm #

    Great minds think alike!

  21. MIchelle May 23, 2010 at 8:22 pm #

    Really….I love this. And another person beat to the comment you only were able to scratch the surface. Many people that are seeking help end up getting snubbed. I hope this practice will change.

  22. Rabbi Umbarger May 23, 2010 at 8:25 pm #

    Great article! I’ve seen a lot of that same stuff going on even here in the podunk state of Georgia. I think that a lot of it comes from someone who has no real importance in their 9 to 5 day and in the paranormal groups, they feel that their collection of TAPS episodes on VHS makes them experts. If anyone disagrees with them, that person is either hated for seeing the one episode that the “expert” missed or is an idiot for not seeing every episode that the “expert” saw.
    As far as The PIRG and I are concerned, other groups can do whatever they want. As long as they leave us out of their little tantrums and grasping at straws for glory. We enjoy learning what the leaders in the field have to say, listening to what history has to tell us and sharing the experience and knowledge that we have with anyone who’s willing to take the time to listen. Anyone that isn’t willing to be a part of the international network of folks interested in the paranormal should go off and form a new network of folks who just enjoy playing drama games and leave the rest of us to what we’re doing.
    http://sites.google.com/site/paranormalirgsite/home
    - Paul!

  23. ryan@MootMagMovie May 23, 2010 at 8:26 pm #

    Thanks so much Katie. Great to put all this into words, some new words to me… paratardation is the NEW para drama… This sure makes my brain surge with ideas… fiction spiced with reality. Moot me baby!

  24. Gennifer May 23, 2010 at 9:17 pm #

    Funny how someone who has stated three times to people she was retiring from the paranormal cant stop herself from contributing to paranormal drama yet one more time

  25. Katie May 23, 2010 at 9:44 pm #

    Gennifer, who are you talking about? I’ve read the comments here, and I guess I am not putting two and two together…

  26. t_alenduff May 24, 2010 at 2:35 am #

    Neither am I Katie. I’ve read your other two articles and I know you never stated you were leaving the field. So just who is Gennifer referring to? And if you don’t like what Katie has to say, then don’t read it. Same concept as if you don’t like a show, then change the channel.

    Katie is not talking about one particular group or show here. She is talking about the paranormal field in general. If you have not experienced, then good for you! I on the other hand have experienced – personally with three other groups right here in GA!!

    As far as TAPS being fake, which I guess your still a big believer regarding your comments on the other articles. Well, sorry to say but Katie is very correct about that as well. I USED to watch until they were proven to fake the jacket pull on their Halloween episode. I started paying closer attention to what was going on, and started hitting the sites that were proving them wrong – in a BIG way, not just the little stuff.

    You see I have two very good friends that live up North. They used to attend their events, were very good friends with J & G wives, and helped them to sell their ‘gear’ at these events. They put alot of their time, effort and own money into helping these guys.

    Long story short, as soon as the show started to really gain in popularity, they acted as if they didn’t know these two friends of mine from anybody else in the ground. They literally started snubbing them. Now it’s too bad that my friends had already seen some things going on that just weren’t kosher at these events. No, they didn’t not start speaking up against TAPS publicly like I thought they should, only told a handful of people like me. Why? Because these two are shit stirrers – they just faded back, but it left a bad enough taste in their mouths that they are no longer in the field. G has admitted to several persons that he can easily fake things.

    I used to attend the chatroom on TAPS site and have a great number of people all over the states. Some friendships have remained, so have not. The ones that remain are also disillusioned with the crap going on in this field. The ones that have not remained friends, well I don’t know about them but the last I heard they are still die hard believers in TAPS and cause a lot of the shit that goes on – good riddance to those friends.

    Sorry Katie, I know this article is not about the previous two. However, when people start getting that holier than thou attitude, well, it kind of tees me off. I have been interested in this field just about all my life (I’m almost 50 now) and while I have not officially been in the investigating field all that long, when I see something not right, I most certainly question it. And yes, I do have limited psychic abilities (I still don’t trust it) and am an empath (still question that as well) and like I said, when others get that holier than thou attitude – well it just sets me off.

  27. Gennifer May 24, 2010 at 7:36 am #

    So you are all saying its okay to air dirty laundry in public if its retaliation? We’re all sick of the drama and have been but everyone’s guilty of it whether or not they think they are.

  28. t_alenduff May 24, 2010 at 7:58 am #

    When others have been guilty of something that is helping to destroy this field instead of furthering it, then yes. Especially when it is by ‘famous’ people.

    I do not freely offer my opinion of other groups or spread rumors about them (and there is a difference between a rumor or a fact). BUT if I’m asked about something, I sure am not going to lie and I don’t embellish the truth either. I tell them what I know about what they asked – if I know. If I don’t then I state I don’t know.

    However, when you have people on a nationalized broadcast TV – they are in the public eye and they should have known they would scrutinized. They should not have sold out to fakery/trickery just to keep their ratings up. They also shouldn’t have turned their backs on those that helped them along. Whether it be past cast members or personal friends. That only proved to me that they are in for one thing – $$$$$$$$. Now they have just so happened to have bought a haunted inn, where they shamelessly plug for people to come and investigate – for big fees???

    Very sad they have turned out like this. They did actually used to be humble.

  29. Katie May 24, 2010 at 10:31 am #

    Gennifer,

    Who has stated three times that they are leaving the field?

  30. Gennifer May 24, 2010 at 3:41 pm #

    Jenny Stewart keeps swearing off the paranormal. She did this a year ago in a blog, she sobbed during a radio show recently telling us all she was leaving again because of drama this is all an elaborate cry for attention and “noooo please don’t go’s!”

  31. Katie May 24, 2010 at 4:22 pm #

    Thank you for the clarification! I was beginning to have that feeling like when someone walks into the room and points towards you, and you look around to see who they are pointing at, and then you’re like “okay, do I WAVE or not?”

    I am not aware of that particular situation, so I’ll leave commentary to those with a dog in that fight.

    Thank you all for your comments. Whether you agree or disagree, at least you are engaged in the topic!

  32. L.T. Cochran May 24, 2010 at 6:31 pm #

    Ohhh Jenny Stewart…I could really stir up some stuff in regard to her and the attacks of a particular organization I happen to be involved in…But I will leave it alone ..sorry y`all ! lol

  33. Katie May 24, 2010 at 10:51 pm #

    I know of no such attacks, and appreciate your discretion. Discretion is the better part of valor, and it is “walking the walk” towards less drama.

    Thank you.

  34. kara meade May 25, 2010 at 9:04 am #

    you lost me at ‘mikes easy on the eyes’

  35. Katie May 25, 2010 at 12:40 pm #

    Oh, I had you at “hello,” don’t be silly.

  36. Mike Roberts May 25, 2010 at 10:04 pm #

    depends on who’s eyes they are. blind people think im sexy!

  37. Katie May 26, 2010 at 12:36 am #

    That’s ’cause they like to Braille you up, baby.

  38. Jen June 26, 2010 at 1:30 pm #

    jenny stewart and mike roberts are self absorbed useless media whores

  39. Katie Mullaly June 26, 2010 at 2:04 pm #

    Hi Jen!

    Thanks for the enlightened viewpoint. Thank you, also, for validating my entire post. Speaking of being a media whore: Check out my new book! Finding Ghosts in Phoenix! Available for pre-order now on Amazon.com!

    BLAM!

    Peace out.

  40. Mike Roberts June 26, 2010 at 2:38 pm #

    I am a whore for media! I am on every magazine cover, TV show…….hate me cuz I’m FAB -u- LOUS!!

    by the way…that was sarcasm

  41. Jenny Stewart June 26, 2010 at 5:15 pm #

    What people dropping names do not realize is that every time you use MY name in a post you are directing this so called attention towards me. I do not have to be self adsorbed or even get on a platform to gain attention because you do the work for me.

    For the life of me I still can not understand what I have done to deserve so much hate directed my way,

    Why am I such a big threat to those using my name here that they have to do just that …drag me into it.

    I wish each of you nothing but peace, understanding and love.

    As far as me…worry less about trying to quote me or even spread things that are fabricated and work more on you and who you feel YOU need to become. Heck volunteer your time at a local food bank but do something more productive then obsess about me because I hate to tell you this…you really are starting to appear obsessed with my day to day life ..am I that much of a threat to you?

    I hope you find some resolve and peace within your own world!
    .

  42. Katie Mullaly June 26, 2010 at 9:03 pm #

    People speak of media as though it is a BAD thing. I am a member of the media, I receive media credentials for events unrelated to the paranormal. I use the media to promote my books and events. I will take whatever positive media I can to promote the fruits of my labor.

    I guess that makes me a media whore, too.

  43. Mike Roberts June 27, 2010 at 2:39 pm #

    I am ready for my next GET FAMOUS QUICK marketing strategy! MEDIA WHORES UNITE!!

  44. Katie Mullaly June 27, 2010 at 5:05 pm #

    Wait a damn minute, if I’m running this media show, that makes ME the media PIMPTRESS…

    Fall in line, bitches*

    *Please note: the use of the word “bitches” is being done so in the general sense. I refer to no particular individual as singularly being a bitch.

  45. Jenny Stewart June 27, 2010 at 6:03 pm #

    I am NOT a media whore , I am a media Goddess…please get it right oh wait that is how most drama gets started because some feel it necessary to (A) Fabricate or create a story to suite their needs about someone else (B) twist the truth until it fits their drama driven story.

    Gotta run..us “self absorbed ” Folks have some audio to review from an investigation we did…you Jenny Stewart followers know what that is right??

  46. Tammy August 9, 2010 at 3:13 pm #

    Actually, your blog is right on. However, your comment about the Divas is way off. We do not “back down when called on our bullshit” because the truth is we don’t have any “bullshit.” We offer commentary on the present state of the paranormal community. We talk about what other people are doing – we’re the messengers, yet we get the crap as if we were the ones that created whatever mess is going on that particular week. Anyone with a different side to a topic we’ve talked about is welcome to give it. We have never trashed a guest and we’re rarely really “mean.” Even Mike has to agree with the fact that we are not all mean girls.
    We’re not all looking for the same things. We just want people to think before doing something stupid. It’s really pretty simple.
    For what it’s worth, if people want to be famous, more power to them! I would rather someone be honest about it and say, “Yeah, I just want to sell books” or “Hell yeah I want to be on TV” than trying to bullshit and be shady.

  47. Mike Roberts August 9, 2010 at 3:32 pm #

    I do agree with Tammy. Not all of the Divas are mean.

  48. Katie Mullaly August 9, 2010 at 7:47 pm #

    “As far as divas go, it’s just like the movie Mean Girls. Feed them Kalteen bars, they’ll get fat and go away. They tend to quiet down when you call them out on their bullshit. I know from experience.”

    I can see where you might think I was referring to The Ghost Divas, however, if you notice I actually have it in lower case letters and I was responding to a post that was made a few comments above referring to groups in GA that have “diva” attitudes (paraphrasing.) (I also don’t know where The Ghost Divas are located, so if they are in GA, all the more confusing)

    I was not referring to The Divas…just divas in general. Again, I acknowledge that it may have appeared that way. I do not know, nor have I spoken to them, although they are always welcome here.

    Thank you for your feedback!

  49. Rabbi Paul Umbarger August 9, 2010 at 8:08 pm #

    As much as I hate to say this, there will probably always be some level of drama in the paranormal My evidence might not be good enough for you, yours might not be good enough for me. With that sort of thing, there are always going to be people who take offence to someone not accepting as proof what they accept as proof.

    For me, I avoid a lot of that mess by simply not caring. I’m not in it to prove anything to anyone. In fact, my group almost never publishes our evidence and partially for just that reason. There will always be some lesser group who try to debunk it simply to make their own group look better.

    For me, it’s not about proving anyone right or wrong. It’s about finding out what I can and having a good time doing it. When someone has questions, I’m more than happy to try to supply an answer for them but, I always remind them that there are others who have other opinions as well. In my opinion, there are simply too many people out there who believe themselves to be the only experts in the field. They’ve seen every episode of Ghost Hunters on SciFi and feel that is the equivilent of a PHD or something.

    My advice is to sit down, shut up and try to have fun hunting ghosts. If you can do that, you may never have a TV show on cable but, you’ll have a lot of fun and just might bump into some stuff that you can’t explain!
    Best Wishes!
    Rabbi Paul Umbarger, co-founder of the PIRG
    http://www.facebook.com/ThePIRG

  50. George September 23, 2010 at 10:01 am #

    You guys are all pathetic running around behind people’s back slamming them left and right and then coming up on this board whining like sissies people do it to you. Live and learn folks, what comes around goes around. None of you are martyrs and you all have horrible reputations because you earned it. Stop your jealousy and hate and your fame crusades.

  51. Vera Ellen September 26, 2010 at 10:34 am #

    Hi, George! Well, I must say you are putting a lot of anger out there for others to read… is that what is meant by “what goes around, comes around?” This community will continue to grow– in love and peace– while still being able to express their opinions honestly. Maybe it’s not WHAT one says but HOW it’s said? Namaste!

  52. Katie September 26, 2010 at 11:28 am #

    I love that these posts are in cyberspace for all perpetuity. It always amazes me when someone gets freshly pissed off about something I wrote months, even YEARS ago.

    Thanks for the readership!

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