My rant about the state of the universal healthcare initiative is going to have to wait. Today, I am a douchebag.
For the past month, I have been lamenting the fact that an entire segment of my neighborhood has had their Christmast lights up…and LIT. Every day we’d drive by and I would say, “Oh, take [...]
Tag Archives: Christmas
Welcome Home, Matthew!
Well, Do They?
I mean, it’s been 25 years for crissakes.
25 years. Man. It seems like only yesterday I was watching MTV with baited breath for the world premiere video. I mean, Duran Duran was there. Where else was I supposed to be that was more important than the possibility of catching a glimpse of John Taylor running [...]
The Annual Holiday Letter!
You know what I LOVE about Christmas time? The annual “this is how my family is doing” updates that people seem to feel compelled to share at the holidays. I suppose I can understand the idea behind it, but the logic tangles when I liken it to a company’s annual report. You get them, you [...]
I Declare War on Santa Hats!
Man, woman or child, if I see someone wearing a Santa hat, I want to knock it off their stupid heads. You’re taking the Christ out of Christmas; I’m taking that queer hat right of your damn head. Especially a grown man. If you’re an adult male wearing a Santa hat to work, you should [...]
It Slices, It Dices, It Juliennes!!!!
You know what I miss about the Christmas of my youth? The commercials. I spent my childhood during the years before cable, and networks were deluged with commercials that evoked more holiday spirit than an entire rack of Hallmark cards. It never felt like Christmas until I heard the first peal of those cheap, jangly [...]
Assholes of the Week
It’s time to hand out my very infrequent and rare Asshole of the Week Award, and it’s a tie this week between blind as a bat New York Governor David Paterson and some attention-hungry slit in North Carolina. Mind you, some white supremacist couple in Pennsylvania made the news after trying to get an extra-vanilla [...]
I Blame Fallout 3 or Why My Christmas Cards Cost More Than Your Dinner
So I haven’t gotten a lot of sleep the last few nights. The first night was because I was determined to finish Fable 2 before bedtime, which turned out to be five A.M. I woke up at 10 to run to Target to pick up the Dark Knight on Blu-ray. That night, I started playing Fallout [...]
Why Can't Christmas be EVERY Day???
Because if it were, we’d be fucked.
Christmas brings out the absolute WORST in people. I was reading an article about how the atheists are under the bus now because of their “just be good for goodness’ sake” campaign. Of course, they preface it with “why be Godly?” So, it’s fairly antagonistic, but still…the point is [...]
Simply Having a Wonderful Christmastime…
It started out innocently enough. I was listening to Christmas music, allowing myself a modicum of giddiness that Christmas is on its way. It just isn’t Christmas in my world if I can’t hear Elton inviting us to “step into Christmas” or Bono reminding us “tonight, thank God it’s them instead of you!”
I madeth a joyful [...]
Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas you Beautiful People!
I hope today is a blast for everyone. If you have family in town, have a good time together. If you get exactly the gift you wanted for Christmas, be sure to smother the person (or persons) that got it for you with praise.
Have a great holiday!
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